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Do I Have To Be Friends With My Cousin?

Dear Advice Girl,

My cousin and I used to get along, but lately she's always criticizing me about my wardrobe, saying my hair is greasy and how I have rolls on my stomach when she has tight abs. My sister says she's turning into a prep. Should I still try to be friends with her?

Signed,
   Nicole

Dear Nicole,

Preppy or not, your cousin is being a jerk by constantly hurting your feelings. And jerks are not exactly friend material.

Here's the thing, though. You and your cuz aren't required to be besties - but you'll share a connection with her that'll last your whole life. And that's not something you can drop just 'cause you feel like it.

So before you do anything, have a heart to heart with her. Tell her how much her insults are hurting your feelings - and your friendship. She might just be oblivious, and hearing it from you will snap her out of it.

And if it doesn't? Try not to explode. After all, you still have to see her at Thanksgiving.

(Psst! Join Advice Girl's Facebook page and get exclusive tips and updates!)

 

Love,
   The Advice Girl


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What users are saying...

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if we could chose our family, life would be different. I have a cousin three years older than me, who I've got along with great as of late, and another 5 months younger who is becoming increasingly irritating and disaproving. Just wait until adulthood, if she's still a pain, just lose contact.
anonymous
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yeah wouldnt be friends with cousins. one of them thinks he is a vampire, a vampire! And to think i was the weird one in the family
n3v3rshoutn3v3r, 13, Santa Clarita, CA
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Just remember that words are only opinions and beauty isn't just skin deep. With those in mind, you shouldn't care what she says.
mcmash65, 15, Northbrook, IL
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i wouldn't be friends with my cousin if she was constantly putting me down
sabrinapb, 13, Lexington, KY
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no way, you dont need to be friends with anyone thats puts you down but,...u might want to talk with yor cuz, and ask her whats up with her and tell her that personality trait of hers can really make her look ugly inside and so she ll at least know how bad she made u felt
sidsqueen, 26, Lubbock, TX
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You don't have to be friends with her or nothing..... Well I'm not friends with any of my other cousins:) I don't even talk to them or anything hehe just ignore here member that saying sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me;)
hershey_kisses80, 16, Post, TX
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Make humour outa it... laughing in the face of a bully always tiks em off big time.... for example did ya know everybody with abs has one spot thats still soft on their stomach? its not all rock hard lol
kayaredbird, 13, Pikeville, NC
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Tell her. She loves you so she doesnt want to hurt you.
vballgirl96, 14, Evansville, IN
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I have a cousin that used to be exactly like that! It was annoying, and very hurtful, so I tried not to talk to her. Now that we're older, it hasn't exactly gotten any better, but i know how to handle it now. Just ignore her :)
maegan_alyse, 15, Gilbert, AZ
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i don't really think you HAVE to be friends w/ her
chelseabartolo, 13, Saipan, MP

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